The Day He Asked

On October 10th, 2015, a long-time dream of a man getting on one knee and asking me to be forever his came true. Years of dreaming about who this man would be (and wondering if he would be), followed my months of anticipation and wondering when the event would take place, all were met with a moment that surpassed anything I could have hoped for. 

And not because it was perfect by the book, but because it was perfect for us. My sour mood earlier in the day didn't subtract even the tiniest bit from the magic that unfolded as my sweet PJ got on his knee in the middle of a sandy shore, and held out the prettiest ring I ever did see. 

I think that was one of the biggest lessons I learned in the months leading up to our proposal. I felt this bizarre pressure to make it perfect, like if I said the wrong thing or woke up in a bad mood, then the moment would forever be tarnished. 

Welp, I did wake up in a bad mood. And that mood wasn't improved when we walked into Starbucks & I ordered my favorite breakfast, only to find they were out. Out! (Gasp, how-dare-they.) 

I thought something like that would damper our proposal story, but it turns out, it adds to it. Because as I reflect on that car ride to the Capitola Beach coast, the one where I was trying to put my big-girl-pants on & muster up a good mood for the remainder of the day, the one where the gloomy sky turned into a gorgeous, sunshiny one in a tangible reflection of God redeeming the day, I think about my sweet fiance sitting in the driver's seat, smiling knowing that regardless of the mood of the girl sitting beside him, he wanted to propose to her that day. 

And propose, he did. ;) 

That man who has every bit of my heart said some of the sweetest words, of which we only remember about half ;), got on his knee, and asked me to be forever his. The biggest question he'd ever asked, was met with the easiest YES I've ever said. 

After a few moments of embracing & beginning to process what had just happened, he pointed out my dear friend Michelle who had so sweetly captured the entire moment. 

I am so grateful for the pictures from this day. The moment passes so quickly, and is every bit as surreal as it is magical. It has been so nice to look back on these photos, and relive the moment that so tangibly altered the course of our lives. The moment when I got to say yes to being the wife of the best man I've ever known. 

Gah, it still gives me chills. ;) 

My sweet PJ, I love you so much. I daily learn how to love well by watching your example. You serve those around you, putting other's needs above your own without a second thought. You are kind, and considerate. You are hilarious, and so. darn. handsome. You are a better dancer than me, even though I fight you on that. You make life fun, and you romance me & make me feel like the luckiest girl alive. 

I could never adequately thank you for choosing me to spend your life with. 

I am so, crazy excited to be your wife. 

Dear Man Whose Car I Hit

The clock was ticking past 5 as I was still sitting in my cubicle, knowing that I had only a matter of minutes to skedaddle and make it in time for my work out class. 

This wasn't just any work out class, it was a) my favorite, and b) that one where it's been far too long since my last work out, and I know I reaaalllyyy shouldn't push it one more day. 

It was needed, both mentally and physically. And regardless of the workload before me, I had to make this class. So I locked my computer, grabbed my purse, and crossed my fingers that I could get through the dreaded Fairview intersection in 10 minutes. 

I did! I even managed to nail my parking job on the first attempt (gave myself a nice pat on the back for that one). With a few minutes to spare, I had just enough time to change into my work out clothes that were tooootally from the "I haven't done laundry in weeks so this is what I have to work with" collection. Everything was looking fine and dandy, until. 

Until. 

That word that signifies the story's about to change, and yupp, you guessed it! This one is. 

I reached down to grab my work out bag and one word came to mind: contacts. They were both vital for the cardio-based work out class, and 100% forgotten as I packed up in the morning. I admitted defeat as I scrounged through my purse and calculated how quickly I could drive home and back. The "and back" part just wasn't going to happen in time. And with an evening full of homework and laundry before me, I figured I just may have to use this as an opportunity to get a head start. 

I silently mourned my work out plans for a few moments before turning my engine back on. Having pulled in with no car to my left, I planned on taking advantage of that space. As my car was turning, I glanced up just in time to see the tan van door I was about to demolish. 

I stopped immediately, both of our eyes like a deer in headlights as we processed what could have just happened. I changed gears, and moved forward into my parking spot, silently thanking God for no or minimal damage, and preparing for a serious chastising. 

The man got out of his car, and examined his door. I was almost afraid to look as he ran his fingers along some scratch marks. I rolled down my window, ready for the much-deserved anger. 

"It looks like I hit you; I'm so sorry," I said. I braced myself as he turned towards me, but instead of resentment and frustration, I was met with unwarranted kindness and grace. 

"You did, but we're not going to do anything about it. I'm just going to go home and buff it out, because if we did something about it, it would ruin your day." 

My eyes welled up with tears, and I said the only words that could come out of my mouth:

thank you. 

He grabbed his gym bag, but before leaving, he said "stop and breath a bit before you go." 

And the tears flowed. 

And flowed. 

And flowed. 

Kindness is powerful like that. I wasn't crying over the situation (okay, maybe a little), or over my work out class, or over the end of a stressful day. I was crying because his kindness blessed me in a way that I didn't know my heart was needing it. 

The truth is, I didn't need a work out class. I needed to hear the words "stop and breath a bit before you go."

Dear man whose car I hit: thank you. 

Thank you for reminding me how powerful it is to live with overflowing grace and kindness in our hearts. 

***

But if we love each other, God lives in us, and His love is brought to full expression in us. 

1 John 4:12

Love Without Sex || 3

For those that don't know the story of how PJ and I met, you can read it all here. It's my favorite story to tell, but for the sake of staying on topic, I'll condense. 

We exchanged our first words at the hotel bar, where family + the bridal party were gathered after the rehearsal dinner. We literally shared maybe 2 sentences; he learned that I wore glasses & didn't drink, and I learned that he was "crashing" the wedding. It was 100% a "he caught my eye from across the room" moment, but zero part of me expected him to be interested. I also didn't know enough about him to be interested beyond the point of finding him extremely attractive. ;)

It wasn't until the reception that all the Disney-topping dreaminess unfolded. And it wasn't until he cheersed my glass of sparkling cider and gave me a sweet compliment that I cued in to the fact that maybe, just maybe, he was interested. 

{A snapchat I sent a handful of girlfriends the day after the wedding. So glad one of them screen shotted this ;) }

So, let's get back to the whole point of this series. Sex. 

I brought up my boundaries with physical intimacy the night of the wedding. Yupp, you read that right. The first night we met. 

It may have been a bit bold, and I very likely could have scared him off. But one: I wanted to scare off any one who wasn't right. I had faith that one day, there would be someone who was right, so I wasn't afraid of losing the others. 

And two: there was actually another girl pursuing PJ that night {dun dun dunnnn}. I really love this part of our story because looking back, it gave each of us an opportunity to care for the other from the first moment we met. 

For me? I wanted PJ to have an exact expectation of what he was pursuing by going after me. I didn't want him to have any regrets at the end of the night, so I figured if he wanted sex at all before marriage, he deserved to know that I didn't. I knew he had other options, and I wanted him to be able to take that other road if it aligned more closely with what he was looking for. 

For him? Having other options blessed the heck out of me when he chose me. And he did so even after I gave him a big ol' stop sign for intimacy before marriage. He was able to take that information, and make a clear decision to still pursue me. 

Girls, there are guys out there who will pursue you even after you speak out about your boundaries and beliefs. And the ones who don't? I know it's easier said than done, but love them and yourself enough to let them go. 

PJ asked if he could kiss me that night, as we sat on a bench looking out at the ocean. It was the most romantic evening of my life, but something in me was able to clearly think & articulate "I really want to, but I know it would mean more if we actually get to see each other again."

To this day, PJ always says that me saying no blessed him. It showed him that I wanted to see him again. And you better believe that I did. :)

We had 3 weeks between the wedding and our first "date." 3 weeks of Face Timing, late night phone calls, and consistent texting back and forth. 3 long weeks of no physical interaction for two very physical people. We love holding hands, hugging, cuddling, and yes, kissing. So the fact that we fell hard for one another without any of those things meant a lot. 

Since that period, we have never gone that long without seeing each other. But I love that our love began through simply communicating. I got to know his heart, not what a good kisser he is. I got to feel pursed because he asked how my day was, not because he jumped on top of me. 

It's the healthiest relationship I've ever been in. And I don't doubt that it has to do with the fact that it began with emotional intimacy, not physical intimacy. I'm fairly certain that any two people who are attracted to one another can experience physical intimacy, but emotional intimacy is a bit harder to attain. 

I was instantly attracted to PJ, hence why our relationship started so quickly. But our friendship? That took time to deepen. I had to get to know his heart and his mind before I could trust him to advise me wisely in moments of trial. And now, it means sooooo much that he is the first person I turn to for advice. And he is the first person I turn to when I have good news to share. He is not just my boyfriend; he truly is my very best friend. 

Our chemistry was immediate, but our friendship had to grow. 

I never really took the time to truly grow and cultivate emotional intimacy or friendship in my other relationships, because physical intimacy became the primary, and arguably only, way of connection. 

I can honestly and whole heartedly say that with PJ, there is such an abundance of intimacy in our relationship, that I don't feel even a hint of lacking from the physical boundaries in our relationship. 

Those 3 weeks felt awfully long between when we met and when I went to visit him for our first date. They especially felt long because I did want to kiss him. Even though I said no that first night on the bench, of course I wanted to kiss this man that gave me butterflies & made me weak in the knees like no man before. 

It was a long 3 weeks, but when I finally got to see him again? When he picked me up at the janky hotel I had rented a room at, and when we drove holding hands to the Oakland A's stadium for a game against my Red Sox? And when I knew that I was about to have my first kiss with him? Absolutely zero part of me was regretting the wait. 100% of me was thankful that we waited until we knew, this was real. 

And when we had that long-awaited first kiss standing in line for the metal detector? Surrounded by people, but apparently both of us just couldn't wait any longer? 

It was perfect. And it was worth the wait. 

Whenever this whole waiting until marriage thing gets hard, I think about how thankful we both are that we waited for our first kiss. I think about how when we got to have it? There was not a single regret in our minds of the timing. 

And I just know that just like our unplanned first kiss in line for the metal detector, it will be perfect. 

And it will be worth the wait. 

***

Here's where you get to chime in!

First off, thank you so much for those of you who have given positive & encouraging feedback about this series. It has truly blessed both PJ and me!

We want to hear from you! Do you have any questions? As a final post, PJ and I are willing & excited to answer any questions you may have. 

Feel free to ask questions below (yes, you can do so anonymously!), or you can e-mail me at sweethomesbblog (at) gmail.com. 

We look forward to hearing from you! And thank you so much for following along in this series that is so close to both of our hearts. 

We love you guys!

Love Without Sex || 1

Those of you who have been around for a while (you know, from when I was consistently blogging) know that I have a huge heart for purity. So much so that I once wrote on it for 31 straight days. I have a heart that beats for lies to be shattered, wounds to healed, and new life to be given. And my passion for this? It comes from experience. Because in a single moment, my lies were shattered. By the grace of God, my wounds were healed. And because of my sweet Jesus, I was given new life. My view on sex was flipped upside down in a matter of minutes, and let me tell you, it was without my invitation. 

That's right, I didn't raise my hand willingly at a church event, or sign a contract proclaiming a new desire to wait until marriage. My God chased me down, with unrelenting love, and gave me a new mind and a new heart for my own good & for His own glory. 

My heart is to share my story in hopes that maybe, just maybe, God is doing the same chasing work in your life. Maybe He's after your heart, and maybe you just need a little encouragement. Maybe you need to see a life transformed to know that it can be done. Maybe you need to hear that there will be men who don't lose interest when you say you want to wait until marriage. Maybe you need to hear that it's okay if you're trying and failing, He won't give up on you. And maybe you need to have the word sexy redefined. 

Cause girl, there isn't anything sexier than a man who looks you in the eye and says "I want you forever" and means it. 

Maybe you're like I was and can't possibly comprehend how a serious relationship can exist without sex. Maybe a glimpse inside of one will give new vision to an area that you never expected would change for you. I never thought it would change for me, but here I am, writing a post about waiting until marriage. 

Whoever thinks God doesn't do miracles anymore? Let me just testify, my life is filled with them. 

I am blessed to have a boyfriend who actually encourages me to talk about our sex life, or lack there of. {ba dum chhh}

So if you're wondering what my wonderful PJ thinks about me writing about such intimate details of our relationship? Wonder no further. He's quite possibly more excited about this than I am. 

{Actually, I take it back. I'm pretty excited.} 

Regardless, this is a joint venture. I may be doing the tapping against the keyboard, but this is a two-person effort. Because this relationship? And this waiting thing? You better believe it's a joint effort. Ain't no way I could do it on my own. 

Why do we care to share our personal details on the internet for anyone and everyone to see? Because we care that much about this. Because somewhere along the way, we both started believing a lot of things about sex that just weren't true. And it's only by the grace of God that we are where we are today. So by golly, we're gonna talk about it. 

This isn't meant to shame, or condemn, or start an argument. If you're feeling judged, please remember who's doing the talking. This is a girl with a sexual past who has no reason or right to judge anyone, and would never want to. This is a girl who believes in loving people, period. Not loving those who agree with you, or loving those who listen to you. Why? Because that's what my Jesus did. 

This series is written with an understanding that these words can do nothing without the power of the Holy Spirit. He alone changes lives, and words can simply testify to His power. 

This series is written with the hope that it will start a conversation in your heart. And not just about sex, because purity isn't just about sex. The title might read "Love Without Sex," but that's only because I once believed that the first required the second. I once was certain that love wasn't real love unless it included sex. 

And because I can speak as someone who truly believed that, it is now my heart's desire to present a love that is romantic, dreamy, exciting, real and yes, without sex. 

But it's only those things because of the single most important aspect. It's romantic, and dreamy, and exciting, and real because it's centered on the God who created love. It's without sex not because of self control, but because of the Holy Spirit who births self control. 

I'm excited to go on this journey with you. I'm blessed to testify of a kind of love that once seemed foreign to me, and is quite often still found foreign to our culture. 

I was recently involved in a sweet conversation with a soon-to-be-bride and a group of both married and unmarried friends. The married friends were giving honest, real, and yes, funny advice on what to expect with sex. It was so beautiful, so innocent, and felt like exactly what romance and marriage were designed to look like. 

A dear friend who knows my heart and my life well kindly checked in with me afterwards, inquiring "did you feel any sadness?"

"No," I said. "I am filled with too much joy and thankfulness and praise over where I am today to have even an ounce of regret."

And that, my friends, is why I share. 

Valentine's Day

I feel like Valentine's Day has gotten its fair share of negative publicity over the years. Whether it's referred to as Singles Awareness Day, or just another American Consumer Holiday, it's not always welcomed with open arms. 

And I get it, I do. As someone who has been sans-date for nearly all of my Valentine's Days, I understand the lukewarm sentiment. But today, I want to share my love for this holiday, single or taken. 

Some of my most memorable Valentine's Days were not the ones celebrated with a significant other. They were not the ones spent on an elaborate or not-so-elaborate date night out. They were the ones where a single act of completely voluntary love caught me by surprise, and left me feeling blessed. 

Like my first Valentine's Day away at college, when a friend knew my heart was still bruised from that high school relationship, and stole the key to my dorm room to surprise me with a teddy bear and chocolates. 

Or last year, when another friend sent a beautiful bouquet of flowers to my office, to make sure I felt loved, appreciated, valued and celebrated. 

Love comes in many forms. February 14th seems to bring a microscope to the romantic kind in your life, or lack there of. But what about all the other kinds that deserve to be celebrated?

We are born into this world through love; the single greatest act of voluntary love belongs to each and every one of us. 

"Even before He made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in His eyes. God decided in advance to adopt us into His own family by bringing us to Himself through Jesus Christ. This is what He wanted to do, and 

it gave Him great pleasure."

Ephesians 1:4-5

We are born with the craziest love we'll ever experience right in the palm of our hands, and best part ever? Nothing can take it away! {Romans 8:38-39, check it.}

I pray that this Valentine's Day, you know that you are so loved. I pray that you feel the insane love of God, and you see the outflow of that in the relationships that surround you. 

Regardless of who you're celebrating with, I pray that you celebrate fully and joyfully knowing that yes, we celebrate love every day. But why not go a little harder once a year? 

The roomies and I pumped things up a notch this year by ordering Valentine's Day cards through Tiny Prints. We had so much fun taking pictures together, and looking through all of their Valentine's collection. I was so excited to see that blue box arrive, and couldn't be more thrilled with how they turned out. It's the perfect way to send out a little personal love on this holiday. 

So from our house, to yours: Happy Valentine's Day! May yours be filled with love, hugs, laughs, joy and chocolate. Lots of chocolate. 

A Letter

Dear May 30th, 2014 Amy, 

You probably should have left 15 minutes earlier for Colleen's rehearsal dinner. You're going to hit traffic, you're going to be late, and you're going to get yelled at as you pass through an intersection a tad bit too close to a pedestrian. 

You're going to feel awkward walking late into the chapel, with everyone else already lined up by the aisle. You shouldn't though, you didn't miss anything, and nobody cares. I promise. 

Plus, 3 and a half months later, you and your boyfriend will get stuck in LA traffic, and entirely miss the rehearsal for his best friend's wedding. So remember, it could be worse. And say a little prayer thanking God for gracious brides and grooms. 

Oh, I'm sorry. Did you get stuck on the word boyfriend? Yeah, I expected that to get your heart pumping a bit. You read it correctly, you have a boyfriend. That cute boy that you're going to spot across the hotel bar after the rehearsal dinner? The one that you're going to find out is a wedding crasher? You're going to fall in love with him. The next 24 hours are going to be the dreamiest of your life; enjoy it. And here you thought you were only here to celebrate someone else's love. ;)

You're going to wake up on June 1st wondering if everything that happened the night before was too good to be true. Don't worry, it wasn't. You're going to think you texted him first, but a few minutes later you're going to see a snapchat that was sitting in your inbox since before you sent that text. It's going to be a picture of the bench you and Mr. Wonderful spent the wee hours of the morning on exchanging life stories. It's going to have a red heart drawn around it, and from that very moment, you're going to know. It's not too good to be true; this is it. 

The next 5 months are going to be full of wonderful adventures that lead you deeper and deeper in love with this man. But I want to let you in on a little secret, God has a lot of other things going on too. 

You're going to apply for seminary school. Yupp, that thing you dream about in the far-off-distant-dream kind of way. One thing will lead to another, and you'll find yourself staring at a computer screen that describes the perfect program for you. You're going to apply, and you're going to get in. Congratulations!

You're going to have a few freak outs as things become real. You'll cry when you make your first payment, and when it hits your account. And when you do your first homework assignment. And when you write your first essay. 

But you don't cry when you do your first midterm, so boom. Progress.

You're going to find out that your job is changing at precisely the same time that you're starting seminary school. You're going to train for weeks before you make the switch, but you still won't feel prepared. The first two weeks will feel like you're in a foreign country, not understanding a word that is spoken to you. You'll almost cry a few times, and you'll feel yourself doubting your abilities. 

Don't. By week 3, you'll have your confidence back. I promise. 

Oh yeah, one minor thing. You're going to speak at church. On a Sunday. For two services. Sharing your testimony. 

I lied. It's not a minor thing, quite the opposite in fact. It's actually the coolest thing that has ever happened to you. Soak in it. Praise Him for it.

Shortly after, you're going to feel the pull to return to your home church. The timing won't really make sense at first, and you're going to get serious anxiety over "letting people down." A little spoiler alert: it's all going to make sense soon. And you're not letting anyone down. Your "pull" is very much from God, and He will bless you by each and every conversation you have explaining the decision to people. 

May 30th, 2014 Amy, get ready for the best 5 months of your life. As you can see from above, you should probably get yourself some tissues for those stress tears. Don't worry too much about them, though. They're all a part of God teaching you how to handle your stress, instead of letting your stress handle you. 

Get ready for a lot of your dreams to start coming true. Getting to share your testimony? Getting to speak on a Sunday? Getting to start legit studying the Bible? Dreams be coming true left and right, lady.

And get ready for the love story that you have been dreaming of since you were a little girl. It's even better, if you can believe it. 

And to think, we're only 5 months down the road. 

Love Always, 

November 6th, 2014 Amy

I Stopped Looking

I always heard "it will happen when you stop looking." And over the course of the last 3 months, I've found that statement to be entirely true. But not for the reasons I thought. 

I always heard that statement, and thought it was just the way the universe worked. It can make it feel an awful lot like God is just sitting up there basing your future husband on your current behavior. Like, the second you say "okay God! I stop looking!" He says "Congratulations! Now you may have the man of your dreams!"

It can really affect a girl's motives when she thinks that God is waiting on her to bring love into her life. At least for me, it did. Until it didn't anymore. Until one day, it finally clicked that God doesn't work that way. My behavior never earns blessings or punishment. It absolutely yields consequences, but it doesn't change the way God feels about me. His timing is perfect, and He's not waiting on me for anything. 

But like I said, I do believe it happens when you stop looking, this love thing. And allow me to explain why. 

I stopped looking. For just over 6 months prior to meeting Peej, I completely eliminated dating from my life. And in those 6 months, my entire mindset about dating and relationships and love changed. 

God took me on an adventure in those 6 months. It's not like I stopped noticing boys, or stopped dreaming about one day falling in love and living happily ever after. I did notice boys, and I did dream of love. Very much so. 

In those 6 months though, I took a step back. For the first time, I started seeing things clearly, and it's probably because I was seeing them from a distance. I started really realizing the qualities I was looking for in a man. And you know what, I don't think it was just the qualities that I was looking for. I think God used that time to show me what He wants for me. How sweet is that? He's such a protective and loving Father. 

My whole life, I would find myself attracted to and dating men that were entirely different than the things I claimed I wanted. For the first time, in those 6 months I saw my attractions change. I found myself attracted to the characteristics on that list that God was writing for me. 

When I stopped looking, I stopped settling. Not necessarily settling in regards to people, I don't like to speak about people like that. I mean settling in regards to love. 

I wanted a specific type of love. I wanted a love that brought butterflies to my stomach, and fire to my heart. I wanted a love that was safe, a love that was honest, and real. I wanted a love full of laughter, and adventures, and passion. I wanted a love that fully captured my eyes and my heart. I wanted a love that was shared, and strong enough to withstand trials. And most importantly, I wanted a love completely centered on Jesus. 

When I was looking, I was settling for less than that love. When I finally felt like enough on my own, when I finally felt like God's love was enough to satisfy that hunger in my heart, I stopped looking. And when I stopped looking, I stopped settling. 

I had clarity when I met PJ. I was able to meet him, and though I was swooning over his handsome looks and incredibly kind words, I was able to keep my mind focused on the goal. The goal was a life full of God's best. 

I knew God's best would be nothing short of the love that my heart desired. So I asked the tough questions, and had the serious conversations, and with the aid of some light-hearted sarcasm and joking, I got my answer. And I got it fast. 

I think it happens when you stop looking, because when you stop looking, it's a lot easier to start thinking. To think about what you want, and to think about what you don't. And to discern when you meet someone which category they fall into, and act accordingly.  

I'm so grateful for those 6+ months sans-dating pre-Peej. I'm so thankful for what they did to my mind, and my heart. I can honestly say I would not be capable of this kind of love without the serious work God did in me in that season. 

After all, there's no reason to look with God, is there? He really is enough. And He really is capable of bringing the very best of love stories into our life, isn't He? 

And because I haven't yet said it on any form of social media, allow me to say it here first. This is where it all started anyhow, it's only appropriate. 

I am insanely in love with this man. 

My Better

I don't often hear audibly from God. I always feel His leading, constantly experience His peace, and I know He's there. But tangibly hear a voice that's not my own? That's pretty rare. 

So when it happens? You bet I hold onto it. 

***

It seemed like a typical Sunday. Besides the fact that I was coming off a church conference high, everything else seemed normal. I woke up, got ready, made my way to the high-school-turned-church down the street, embarked on my usual round of greetings/hugs, and went into the theater for service. 

Worship started, and I was whole-heartedly worshiping, while utilizing the spiritual gift of multi tasking. {you know you've done it too}

My mind was in two places, half focusing on the powerful lyrics of praise, and half focusing on a potential love interest. Thoughts were swirling as we sat for a slower song, which is usually my prime time to channel my inner rebel and stand. But for some reason, this time I sat. I sat, and I thought. 

When I was just about to reach a personal record for the amount of over-analyzing performed during a worship set, a voice stopped me. Clear as a bell, I heard the words that I haven't since forgotten. 

Amy, I have better for you.

The sentence repeated itself a handful of times, as my mind just soaked in that moment. It took me a while to come back enough to realize I had missed the cue to stand, and was now the sole individual sitting in the midst of a raised audience. 

Dang, I thought to myself. 

I wrote it down. I let that promise sink in good and deep, because I knew there was no other alternative for processing a word like that from God. 

It had nothing to do with the person on my mind, and everything to do with a loving Father trying to get His daughter's attention. Mission completed, Big Guy. 

I didn't know exactly what "better" was, but I knew my God was revealing to me that He had a different plan. And praise the Lord, I was finally at a place of trusting Him enough to know that

His plan is the only one I want. 

***

We were driving in the car, stuck in San Francisco traffic. I knew I was falling pretty hard when I didn't want the traffic to clear. I was enjoying just being with him, miles of break lights and all. 

There were moments of silence, and I actually enjoyed them. They gave me time to soak up everything that was happening, the butterflies and the magic and the jitters of a new relationship. The stuff that you never want to go away. 

In one of those silent seconds, that story came to me. I went back to that moment of hearing that promise from God, and I smiled from head to toe realizing the truth of that statement. 

I looked down at our holding hands. I've got a story for you, I said. 

I finished, and paused. With the biggest smile on my face, I squeezed his hand a little tighter. 

You're my better, I said. 

***

He has so much better for us, guys. I never want to forget that promise that was given to me that Sunday morning, because I never want to settle for less than His plan. 

It's not just with relationships. He has a perfect plan for me, and a perfect plan for you. So easily we can look to this world, and try to figure it out on our own. Try to accomplish our dreams, go after our goals, strive to be the person we want to be. 

Guys, He's got better for us. So much better. And I hope, and I pray that none of us miss it.